Travel stories

Travelling in Southeast Asia was far and away the most adventurous thing I have done in my life. Different countries, outrageously different cultures, different haircuts. Some experiences were good, some weren’t, but they were all interesting and the “life” knowledge I accumulated in that short period was vast. Here’s a story from Thailand:

It was the night after my travelling companion from Hong Kong left. Hendrix was a pasty, red-headed kid from rural Indiana who, though he tried admirably to escape the image of the classic American tourist, nevertheless found himself walking around in a bright Hawaiian shirt with an oversized Pentax camera attached to his chest and a neon-red sunburn in the places where his cowboy hat failed its duty. We spent a few days in Bangkok before heading to the islands in the south. After spending a relaxing few days on the beach, Hendrix returned early to HK, and this was a major turning point in my trip. I was forced to meet people and mingle and all those social activities I usually avoid.

The first person I met was a friendly, blond-haired 29yr old Dutchman named Arjen, who had been travelling around Asia for 8 months. That night, after the usual dinner of “shrimp Thai noodles” (a.k.a. pad thai) and a couple large beers in the wooden hut overlooking the beach ($4 total), we decided to walk to a few bars on the island. Fast forward a few hours and a few drinks later, and both Arjen and I are dancing with a couple of gorgeous local Thai girls, who happen to be friends. My girl had soft Asian features, mocha skin, huge brown eyes, a mischievous, playful smile and a typically slender figure. Now, I will be the first to admit there are some nights where I’m not on my game, but this wasn’t one of them. I was simply on fire. I teased and charmed, and charmed and teased, and was very pleasantly surprised by her cheeky responses. Just as I began to congratulate myself on choosing the single private bungalow instead of the “dorm-style” hut (which was $1.50 cheaper per night), Arjen approached and said that he was about to take his girl back, and that his girl really wanted my girl to go home with me.

Being the cynical person that I am, I immediately became suspicious. I mean, why was this girl so keen for her friend to go home with me? In my neurotic Jewish mind, it couldn’t be the fact that she simply liked me. Something didn’t smell right, and it certainly wasn’t the puke that a drunken Brit had so unceremoniously splashed at my feet a few moments earlier. A thought entered my mind, and though I hoped it wasn’t true, I knew that it most likely was. Resignedly, I turned to Arjen, hoping that he would think me a fool for asking:

“They’re prostitutes, aren’t they?”

“Yes, I believe so. That’s not a problem is it?” he asked with a certain amount of incredulity.

At which point in time I paused. I looked at my girl, who was staring at me longingly, with those beautiful brown eyes. Damn, why her! Of all the girls I could’ve picked, I chose the one who would present me with a moral dilemma at the end of the night. I looked at her friend, who was not so subtly imploring me to bring her friend along, for moral support I suppose. My problem is I’ve always been the good kid. I’m the kid who said no to drugs. I’m the kid who always did his homework. I was the kid who if I didn’t have anything nice to say, didn’t say anything at all. And now, this identity of mine was being tested. The fact that Arjen was so bewildered at my response to his response made me think that perhaps it’s ok to have sex with prostitutes. I mean I’d obviously use protection, so what exactly would be wrong with it?

To be continued.

Blog-myopia

So I haven't made a substantial post for a while, and I'm not totally sure why. It may have something to do with the fact that the only substantive ideas floating around my head these days are personal issues that are boring and/or probably of interest to no one but myself (fingerprints anyone?) It was never my intention to use this blog as a personal soapbox from which to rant and rave, and decry fate and coincidence and bad luck and rainy days. And since it seems like those are the only genres of posts my fingers would like to type these days, I'd prefer to remain silent. As Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson and James Brooks too I guess) once uttered:

"It's not true. Some have great stories, pretty stories that take place at lakes with boats and friends and noodle salad. Just no one in this car. But, a lot of people, that's their story. Good times, noodle salad. What makes it so hard is not that you had it bad, but that you're that pissed that so many others had it good."

I'm not sure how that applies to this situation, but it just popped in and it's a great line. The good news is that my studying will arrive at its glorious conclusion on June 3rd: CFA Day. Oh the consumption of beverages to follow! Jager and tequila and vodka, oh my! Actually the last two years I've gotten home exhausted after the 6hr exam sessions, had a few tots of good ole JD's and fallen into a worry-free sleep. Actually, that sounds good too right about now.

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Super

This is the first trailer that actually makes me want to see: Superman Returns
Gotta love Kevin Spacey hamming it up as Lex Luthor.

Funny.

Check this out : Snakes on a Plane auditions

good for a couple laughs.

Guaranteed to be good?

There are a few entertainers who have risen above the rest. Through a combo of innate talent and savvy project picking prowess, these people have come to guarantee first-rate entertainment. Their name in the credits is all it takes for me to fork over my $10. In no particular order: Tom Cruise. Steven Spielberg. Tom Hanks. Denzel Washington. Michael Mann. Jodie Foster (yes, Jodie Foster). Peter Jackson. Perhaps Nick Cage, though that's a little bit of a stretch. The list is not long. But this summer looks like it will wipe a few names off this list.

First MI:3 failed to live up to my expectations - one of the first Cruise movies to disappoint in a while. His record is blemished. And now the critics are tearing the Da Vinci Code apart, a film that I have been looking forward to for a while. Tom Hanks, who in my mind is severely miscast, might take his final bow on the list. Who's next?

This movie-going summer is coming to an abrupt halt before it's begun. The only thing I'm looking forward to is Michael Mann's "Miami Vice", and that's because it reminds me of Collateral. What a sad, sad summer for movies.

abercrombie dreams.

(no subject)

What are the things that give you joy in life? You know, the things that make you happy. The things you can't wait to do when you finish work. The things you would do if you had all the time in the world. The things you will spend your retired life doing.
Got a list? My question is: why aren't you doing them right now? Why isn't your short/long term goal the attainment of these things?
Now I know it might seem like a silly question, but it has its basis in truth - and I'm looking for serious responses. Oblige me.

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Ahem, and now for something completely different.

Movies:

Before Sunset - I rewatched this over the weekend. It's simply one of my favourite movies in the last few years. View it with your girlfriend or date: it's a good litmus test. If she likes it, she is worthy of another date. If she doesn't, she's done. She's a cold-hearted bitch.

This is a song sung in the movie by Julie Delpy (she's unreal in this movie, sexy, intelligent, passionate. And a good singer/songwriter to boot.)

"Let me sing you a waltz
Out of nowhere, out of my thoughts
Let me sing you a waltz
About this one night stand

You were for me that night
Everything I always dreamt of in life
But now you're gone
You are far gone
All the way to your island of rain

It was for you just a one night thing
But you were much more to me
Just so you know

I hear rumors about you
About all the bad things you do
But when we were together alone
You didn't seem like a player at all

I don't care what they say
I know what you meant for me that day
I just wanted another try
I just wanted another night
Even if it doesn't seem quite right
You meant for me much more
Than anyone I've met before

One single night with you little Jesse
Is worth a thousand with anybody

I have no bitterness, my sweet
I'll never forget this one night thing
Even tomorrow, another arms
My heart will stay yours until I die

Let me sing you a waltz
Out of nowhere, out of my blues
Let me sing you a waltz
About this lovely one night stand "
- Julie Delpy
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2006 FA Cup Champions: Liverpool!

You’ll Never Walk Alone:
When you walk through a storm
Hold your head up high,
And don’t be afraid of the dark,
At the end of a storm,
There’s a golden sky,
And the sweet silver song of a lark,
Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Though your dreams be tossed and blown,
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart,
And you’ll never walk alone,
You’ll never walk alone.

if you have a little time to waste.

If you're bored, check this out. I have only one question: Deal...or No Deal?

Disclaimer: Addictive. My max win = $500K.

abrupt turn

Ok, this blog has taken a turn for the worse recently and I'm in no shape to turn it around. So, I'll leave it up to good ol' Jerry instead:

JERRY SEINFELD: I’ll tell you what I like about that mad cow disease… [audience laughs]… I like the fact that we’re attempting to blame it on the cows! “They are crazy!” [audience laughs]. “They are nuts!” “These cows are out of their minds!” [audience laughs]. Of course the cows are thinking “Oh yeah… You’re drinking me, you’re eating me, you’re wearing me, you’re sneaking up on me and tipping me over…” [audience laughs and claps]. “Yeah, and I’M a little off mentally?!” [audience laughs]. “That’s why we’re mad!” [audience laughs]. Maybe it’s a good thing. Maybe we’ll eat a little less. Everyone in this room is trying to lose a little weight. A little… something. Everyone’s trying to lose something. And not one of you is doing it. [audience laughs]. I’m not doing it. No one is doing it. Not one person is losing weight! Not one! [audience laughs]. Do you think that a possible explanation could be that we are still trying to find ways to stuff MORE CHEESE into A PIECE OF PIZZA?!!! [audience laughs]. We’ve hollowed out the crust. [audience laughs and claps]. We hollowed out the crust about 3 years ago. Now we’re double-layering the foundation. I understand they have a new thing coming out… They will actually bake you’re head right into the pizza! [audience laughs]. Pizza Hut. It’s called ‘Hey Pizza-Face’ [audience laughs]. And you wear the pizza and attempt to eat your way out of it. [audience laughs]. Too much food! Too much food! What about this commercial for Subway Sandwiches. This guy Jarred. [audience laughs]. Is anyone buying this for a second? He supposedly lost like a hundred pounds on an all hoagie diet. [audience laughs]. Does it not boggle your mind to contemplate the insane quantities of food this disgusting human being must have been eating before… [audience laughs and claps] …if he is now slimming down on a strict regimen of meatball heroes?! [audience laughs]. Did he have like a Dunkin Hines IV in his arm just green-lining frosting? No, we’re all supportive of Jarred. We’re rooting for Jarred. In fact if anyone knows Jarred, please say hello for me. [audience laughs].

Time and Money.

Time is a lot like money.

The less of it you have, the more of it you want.
The more of it you have, the less of it you need.

Good things happen if you spend it well.
Bad things happen if you spend it poorly.

When you're young, you don't think of it at all.
When you're old, it's all you think about.

And that's all I've got for today.

odds

So apparently we weren't on the same page with the "fingerprint" thing. What I was thinking was this: it's quite a strange, unique part of our body, but it's something we never think about unless we're watching CSI. What role did it serve in the evolutionary process? Scientists say the ridges allow us to grip things better. Perhaps. But that doesn't explain how or why it can identify one person out of billions. Anyhow that's that.

Do you ever feel like you have to do something drastic? To blast your life's orbit onto a different path? I think I'm there. Being out of a job for a while is hard. The one thing that I find most difficult to take is the effect it has on others - my family for example. I put enough pressure on myself to find a job and get my life straightened out, but it's made even more difficult because of the stress it puts on everyone else. And that's something I have to work out really soon. Or take drastic action.

In other news, we lost our final playoff game in indoor soccer, which was a big disappointment, since we won the overall league a few weeks earlier. We fought hard but the crossbar certainly wasn't our friend, mine imparticular. Anyhow, went out for beer and wings and that's never a bad thing.

cheers!

A Random Thought

I was wondering about this today. Why do we have fingerprints? Think about it. Can anyone come up with a viable reason to explain why human beings have a unique fingerprint?

Food for thought.

Convo

Person(P): Hey M, what you up to?

M: Not much.

P: How are you?

M: Meh, I'm ok.

P: What does that mean?

M: You know, fine. Not bad. Comme ci comme ca.

P: Are you working?

M: Nope.

P: Really? Why?

M: Not sure, really. I think it has something to do with taking a job I liked but took 3 years of my life and gave me a set of non-transferable skills in return. And when I didn't like the job anymore, I took those non-transferable skills and proceeded to offer them to companies who, funnily enough, replied saying "thank you for your interest. we are looking for someone about 3 years younger, with transferable skills."

P: Funny. But you're a bright guy, you must be doing something to make money?

M: Well I do play poker quite a bit.

P: So you're a professional poker player?

M: No, but I do dabble.

P: OK, then what do you do all day?

M: Well, I eat, study for about 2-3 hrs, play poker for 2 hrs, go to gym for 1.5hrs, write a stupid blog for about .75hrs, watch about 2-3 hrs of crappy T.V., read soccer and other news for about 1hr, and sleep the rest.

P: What about searching for a job?

M: Oh right, add an hour for that. And 20 mins for deleting rejection emails.

P: Don't worry, it'll happen soon.

M: That's what I've been told. Though the road to hell is paved with jobless people, as they say.

P: You mean "the road to hell is paved with good intentions"? That has nothing to do with anything.

M: Listen, smarty pants, not everyone went to "Dipshit U" like you did OK?

P: OK, I get it, sore subject. How do you pay the rent?

M: Oh I live at home.

P: Really? How old are you?

M: Old enough to kick your ass.

P: No need to get testy.

M: OK, I'm 27, but watch your step tough guy. I will not hesitate to hand you the beating of a lifetime.

P: Calm down. Any girlfriend?

M: Yes, Natalie Portman.

P: No, I mean non-imaginary.

M: You're so close to getting a furious beating, and you have no bloody clue.

P: Come on man, just curious.

M: Nope, no girlfriend.

P: When's the last time you were in love?

M: Jesus, who are you, Oprah? Let me think. OK, I remember. The year that nice young American president got shot, Johnny something.

P: JFK?

M: Yup, that's the bloke.

P: That was 1963.

M: Great year.

First Bond Trailer.

Here is the new James Bond trailer (in English!) I have to say I think updating the series is an excellent idea. Going back to Bond's start in MI:6 and how he earns his 00 status gives them a chance to go back to basics; forget crummy special effects and lame dialogue. I want Bond to get down and dirty. I think Daniel Craig could be a great Bond - I must admit however I thought Timmy Dalton was a terrific Bond.

Enjoy.